Evening Thought--Prospering In Place.

I have always loved the mountains. They were something of a sanctuary and a refuge. The stress of my work, was indeed, my stress, my work. A trip to the mountains could take away some of the pain and anxiety of that work. I gravitated to the mountains and always hoped to live near them, even in them.

Debbie never had the same ideas, like the need to get away and certainly the need to go to another state with satisfying mountains. So I made several trips over the years to the mountains, just me and my car. They were good, if not a bit lonely.

When I realized that I would probably never live in the mountains, I began to accept that fact, maybe some 20 years ago or so. In fact, I learned to bring the mountains to me, in the form of woodcrafts, and other vacations or staycations. What I was really learning was a sense of satisfaction no matter where I was and what I could do.

I was able to transfer the psychic energy of planning, dreaming and engaging with the mountains into other pursuits, closer to home. I’ve still made trips out west, deserts, mountains and the Pacific, but I was not in the same need of repair or level of repair after I made that change in mindset.

You might say I learned to find peace no matter where I was at. I actually think it’s more than that. I had to learn what made me search for that peace in the first place. I had to get in touch with my own pain and find out why I felt the pain and then find alternative and sometimes better ways of dealing with that pain. Many times, I didn’t deal with it well or at all, stuffing it, ignoring it, or suffering through it.

It’s taken me a year of walking around the lake out back to get a fuller measure of what this place has to hold for me and Debbie. It’s been an experiment in not running away, but prospering in place. Something I hope for others to learn.

Report

Warmer this morning, 40 or so, felt good enough to lighten the clothing a bit and leave the gloves at home. Felt just a little lighter, good feeling. Some fog, no sun, kind of gray, but zip in our step. We made it around pretty quickly, stopping to say hello to the doggy brigade on the north side. Michael called as we neared him with some bad news, hopefully turns into good news. Mallards, Geese, Blue Jays, Juncos, Coots and Mr. Bufflehead. Several calls to Michael, keep his spirits up. Christmas is near, he might be back in town soon. Hope so.

Winter Solstice Report

Nice with no breeze, about 40. Clouds filled in the sky. Nice walk, the Eagle, Edward flew down the channel toward his Northside perch. We saw just before that, maybe a 100 geese and a few mallards among them. Then the Kingfisher made a crossing over the channel. quite a few Robins down by the bridge, some more Mallards, the Bufflehead and on to some Coots. Some Northern Shovelers in there as well. A few Juncos, a Bluejay or two. Woodpecker, maybe Red Belly at Home just after noon. We’ll take a little drive out to Branched Oak, see if we can see anything. Some Gulls too. Wreathes at ball field, Deb on the dam and pic from yesterday and new Zoom lens, Bufflehead.

Morning Report

32 feels 22 10south

Coots, mallards, red tail, hello to June and Banjo. Nice walk, extra clothes, ski goggles. Should be less wind tomorrow.

Morning Report

Feels Like 15

Winds 10 NNW

Must have been 25 or so

Did Monday Morning Fresh in First Cove

One lone Bufflehead near spillway, Coots near first creek, Mallards near Antelope creek and east pond, Said hello to Larry and Toby. Franklin Gulls flying about. Mallards and Shovelheads in South lake as we neared home. A pair of BlueJays to guide us back to our house. Don’t remember any Geese, no Eagles, though Larry said he saw them on the nest tree and signs posted Do Not Disturb type signs. Mostly quiet, not too windy, even though 10 from NW. Dressed well and walked well. Did notice less ice than yesterday even though it was colder last night. Must be wind kept it at bay. Not a cloud in the sky, bright, strong sunrise.

Walk A Day, Notice-Name-Know.

For some 15 months now, we have walked every morning at Sunrise. What has changed. My endurance has improved. Climbing the few hills around the dam still are taxing, but I do it just a little bit easier. Some of my muscles still hurt, mostly in my quads and ankles. Walking every day has become habit and there is more anticipation about walking.

The main thing that has changed is a mindset, almost a relational philosophy. We have a different and growing relationship with what is essentially our backyard. Over the last year we have developed a pattern that looks like this. Notice, Name and Know. It started with the landscape around us and the sun, quickly moving into the winged wildlife. Debbie grew earnest about getting the sun into her eyes and body. That started it, and Noticing the birds began with Spring migration. Mostly waterfowl because they were more stable and easy to Name. And quite often, we Know some of them. We give them names like Ms. Hyacynth or Mama Goose, the Eagles we have named Edward and Abby, their spring offspring was Ms. Kinsie.

We Notice-Name-Know our surroundings behind our house. That also includes people, wind speeds, ice flows, trees that are harvested or die, Coyote families and quite a bit more. It seems all relational. It is quite a change from the work we did before and yet it has many of the same elements of developing relationships. It’s been a blast and we are looking forward to seeing what each day brings.

Courage Colaboration

At times in my life I've been rather courageous, willing to take risks without measure. Some of those adventures as I call them were fortuitous. Going into the Army, Flight school, marriage, family, school for ministry after all that and many years of pastoral service. The funny thing is that I would often need others for inspiration or courage when I needed it most. My father kind of poured or even forced some courage into me, only way he knew how I guess. After my father though, it took a number of heroes that I mostly read about. And I would end each reading with the sense that what they had done was pretty neat, even amazing. Sometimes I would think, they did it, no reason I can't do something similar. Most of my heroes were dead, so it wasn't a competition, it was an urgency created by their legacy. And all the big and most of the small things I've done in my life have come from seeing someone as a hero and then saying I can do that too. I've never had courage just show up automatically from deep down in my heart as much as I've had someone come along with me and offer their hand in partnership.

Stopping Conflict

I tried one time to put myself in the middle of a group of Red Brangus Bulls that were fighting. I was actually on a large Ford tractor and I thought I was protected enough, or maybe I didn’t think it, just assumed it. I wasn’t. Those bulls were going to fight no matter what, even if I ran over them with the tractor.

And for all my trying to do good since these were expensive purebred bulls, I was almost collateral damage in the process. they came right up over the engine, legs flailing and flying all around me in the seat. I don’t remember getting hurt but it sure was a close call, chaos supreme.

I just let them fight. They clearly didn’t want any help from me. Those same bulls had ganged up on a big Simmental bull sometime before that and broke his leg. I had to take him to the hamburger shack where he fetched 1200 dollars instead of 5,000 or more, his healthy value.

Watching those fights was painful. Beautiful creatures intent on destroying each other. Once you’ve witnessed such belligerence, you hope to never see it again. It turns your stomach.

Watching the tragedy in Israel and Gaza gives me the same feel, many times over. I have the urge to jump in the middle and say STOP as loud as I can. But I’m sure that I would end up in a bad way and the fighting would still go on. It really hurts to see it.

My visits to Israel left me humbled and excited for having been to such a historic and holy place. I have so many snippets and memories of the land and the culture and the story that I feel like I’m at home there. But the fighting frightens me. A place that has had as much religion as Israel has and they have had so much conflict. It is too much to understand.

May there be a just peace soon. I say that with little hope for it historically, but much hope because of my faith in God. He does not want what is happening to continue I’m sure. We must hear His voice.

Conflict

I remember a quote from a Baptist pastor talking about pastors, “You’re either in a storm, coming out of a storm or going into a storm.” He had a successful church in Washington, DC. Wonderful pastor and preacher, and it seemed like there was always something to fight about. I think the title of his book was, Preaching Through a Storm. Great book, tragic that we need books like that.

Why are we so angry with each other? I think it’s because we are afraid of each other. We are afraid of losing something that makes our lives better, whatever that may be. The way so many people talk to each other, especially through Social Media is downright horrible. No excuse for it, but it is mainstream now.

I used to use Facebook and Twitter to try to learn something, Youtube as well. I still check all three but I’m rarely very far from angry messages that threaten to storm their way into my life, always stormy somewhere nearby.

The city of Peace, Jerusalem is not very peaceful. If you can’t find peace there and enjoyment of life, and companionship that does not breed fear, where can you find it? I don’t know really. After reading that book, I’m not very hopeful that peace will ever be a part of our lives again. Not long term, widespread peace. I hurt for those that do not know peace., and would rather make war. Such a meager existence to live that way.

Praying for peace tonight.

Friendly Face---Maybe, But Welcome

This Eagle is well mannered it seems. We’ve seen him in this same spot a lot. He and his mate killed a Pied Billed Grebe last winter from this spot by keeping the Grebe under water. And there was a Grebe there this morning, along with a Ruddy Duck. At this point, my wife goes aww, so sad, and I say, the Eagle has to eat. Then we go on. No eating that we saw today, but the day is young.

For now, I’ll call him a friend. What he calls me, I’ll never know. He’s got both eyes on me, so I must be interesting to him at least. Not boring today by his behavior.

The Silver Maple is still green leaved and winter is not here yet, but the temps were in the 30’s this morning and gave us some coolish clues. All in all, it was beautiful and peaceful, just the way we like it.

Day Dawn

Only the day dawns to which we are awake… Henry David Thoreau

Air is fresh, alive and cool. Brought in over a hundred Coots and a posse of Cormorants. Birds migrate when the weather changes and others hunt when the others migrate. Hawks were busy this morning.

The day is alive and so am I. And so are you. I’m glad.

Looking for What

Every morning we get to visit with the sun, usually we get a full view like the one above. Occasionally, the sun is hidden behind clouds that filter the brightness. It has become a daily necessity to greet the sun as we begin our day.

It actually changes your mood, starting with the sun makes the day brighter. Go figure. This practice that we take seriously now, is similar to another practice, looking forward to a positive future.

James Thurber had this to say. “Let us not look back in anger, or forward in fear but around in awareness.

I’ve been trying to do this for years. Sometimes, it seems harder to do than ever. I still think he was right, and in fact, the tougher the times, the more we need his advice.

So we wake up with the sun each day, and get a good start on starting out right, leaving our fears behind and placing our faith in God’s care. There is no better time it seems for this practice than now.

Recovery

I wasn’t able to walk with Deb today and I’m none too happy about it. My leg has not been very user friendly for three weeks now. Some days are better, but I’ve lost a good two weeks of walking.

I’m more patient these days than I used to be but I’m getting thin on patience. It’s a feeling of laying around and not being useful that does me in. So I’ll look over some recent pics like these Pelicans and keep streching and working my thigh muscles to get back out there.

Cool days ahead. Optimistic.

Tree Cutting Epidemic?

The tree cut down in Great Britain recently seems to have been a special, 300 year old tree. This tree above is a local favorite of mine, Tamarisk. I did a search on Cut Down Tree and I was surprised on how many trees have been cut down by vandals of late.

I gave up some time ago trying to figure out why stupid people do stupid stuff, there seems to be no good reason for much of it. I’m sure there was something that motivated them to do what they did. But to call it a reason is too much for me, they are not reasonable.

Trees symbolize things, especially strength, wisdom, age, persistence, all the good things about life in general. So to cut one down for no good reason seems violent, destructive, criminal and the taking of a living thing and destroying it.

I’m not sure we will ever get to the bottom of why people do stuff like this. But one of the most obvious emotions associated with this behavior is anger. When we find out why people do what they do that is destructive, we will find anger very close by. Which leads us to perhaps a more important question, Why are people so angry? I’d like to know.

Curious

I’ve always measured my curiosity level by how many library books I have checked out at one time. It’s over 20, not bad for me. I’m still pretty curious.

“To be curious is to be alive.” Katherine Edelman.

My curiosity is all over the place at times. For some 40 years, people held much of my curiosity. I learned a lot about what made them tick, why they did what they did and how to help them recognize their own feelings and failings, as well as successes.

The last 16 months, not so much. My curiosity has turned me back toward earlier, younger pursuits. Mostly nature, family, living in the outdoors, things like that. I often wanted to escape from the draining work of people over the years, but I never really got very far away from it. Every vacation was too short and when you came back, you were right back in the thick of things.

I guess that is normal in many cases. But I wished for something other than a normal life, just the same. I spent a fair bit of time wondering and trying to understand why a few people are a royal pain in the but. And then as a sidetone, I wondered why people would stand by and do nothing when the troublemakers seemed to take over.

We just don’t like fighting I guess. And that dislike made me read a lot of books about people and what made them so difficult to live and work with. It’s probably one or two people in a hundred that are this way, but they still take up a lot of your time. The first book that gave me a lot of courage was called Living With Difficult People by William Branson. It was about the main Personality Disorders in people, but it was well written for a layman instead of other psychiatrists. It helped me a lot.

Remember, I did not want to classify or pigeon hole people accourding to some disorder, I wanted to help them, I did not want to cancel them, I wanted to enable them.

Being naturally curious I read as many books as I could find on the subject and found a local author who was an expert in Heresies. He was a Lutheran scholar and so he knew a thing or two about heresy. Along with heresy is a ton of conflict. He taught me a lot through the lens of heresy and the trouble and divisiveness it breeds.

Anyhow, to survive the small amount of trouble over the years, I had to be really curious. I can’t see how you can have much of a life if you are not curious. I confess that it’s nice not to have to be curious about people for a while, not that I have them all figured out. I’m very glad to be curious about other things, important things that I left alone for many years.

I’m glad to be back in the court of the curious. It’s pretty neat out here. Here’s a spicture of my curiosity.

Bordeom As Inspiration

I have trouble admitting I’m bored. I remember hearing that Boredom is a sin. I believe that a little bit. But then I don’t. But I still dislike saying I’m bored. Maybe Boredom is such a short term feeling in me that I get to doing something quickly, before I get really bored. Play a game, read, write, clean house.

I realized today as I was cleaning the garage, that I can be inspired by cleaning up, tidying up an area. Cleaning off the writing desk or putting all my shoes in order, whatever, this tidying activity seems to make me feel better. I imagine it gets me ready for some other more creative burst of making or thinking.

I clean my room and my garage. Debbie does the rest. I dodged a bullet there. Dare I say it, she seems to like cleaning, especially outside around the house. I wonder if she is bored, now that I think about it? Maybe it’s just her nature. Not so much mine.

But I want to use the cleaning, tidying time to be inspired. Maybe like magnetic charging stations, get a vacuum in my hand and some of the energy transfers to my inner batteries.

I decided, or it came to me, or I had this crazy idea to write a blog post every day this month. That’s a lot of cleaning, so I left a lot undone in the garage. I’ll space it out over th next 30 days. Gotta grab the inspiration whenever you can, right?

A Minister Is Intimate With Suffering

It seems that suffering increases year after year. The heart of Ministry is to relieve the suffering. Those that minister will move toward suffering and do so confident that God understands all suffering and those that suffer. His word for us is, A better day is coming and I will never leave you. That is the base line for ministry. Hope and presence.

Number One Birding

I just read that “The State of Nebraska is ranked seventh in bird species nationally. In 1995 Forbes magazine listed Grand Island, Nebraska as the number one birding spot in the world.”

Well I’ll be pickled. Knowing what I know about birding in this state, I would move that a little further west say towards Kearney. And then I would have to fact check the Forbes site to see if they really said that. But I’m a bit lazy and resist the urge to disagree, especially when I kind of already believe it. Still, number one birding spot in the world. At least in 1995 anyhow.

Maybe. What has me more fascinated is how readily Deb and I have taken to becoming serious birders in the last year.

I got the birding bug in college and Deb finally got the bug as well. I have long enjoyed nature and its branches for comfort, solace and respite but Debbie is a bit of a late bloomer. Nothing wrong with that of course but it gives me a chance to not only observe birds again but to watch her as well as she finds a new passion.

And she has taken to it like, well, a duck in water you might say. In fact, she prefers ducks and waterfowl, I think because they don’t flitter around in the tree branches, making it hard to identify them. She likes to keep the list you might say.

Yesterday we saw Green Wing Teal, a first for her. She got child like with fascination. We also got a glimpse of Prairie Chickens, which might never happen again as they are declining. But two new birds for her made the day fantastic. This was north of town in the grasslands mostly. The region truly is bird rich.

We have a lake of over 100 acres to walk around every morning and Deb is well on her way to becoming the most passionate birder in the area. If you want to see some of our sunrise activities, check out our Facebook group, Holmes Lake Walkabout. Some pretty good pics almost every day of sunrise and creation.

Anyhow, since we’re in the number one birding spot in the world, I’m gonna clean up my binoculars and get ready for a new day.

Summer not over yet

Wow, what a year or summer for sure. Should be above 100 several days this week. Or shouldn’t be, I suppose. But probably will.

Watching a rare Western Grebe this week on the lake, meeting a few new birder friends. We’ve kept up our daily sunrise walk about an hour each day and it has been a life changing time. I’m still not an official early bird yet, but working on it, making some progress.

We’ll be up in the Black Hills soon with good friends, rocking and birding and hiking and stuff like that in the Custer area.

If you’re up there near Labor Day, we might run into you.

Update

Just some itty bitty updates on Thurbers;

Debbie and I are enjoying Spring, man it’s getting nice. We agreed to lead a Grief Recovery seminar at church, we are calling it Seasons of Grief. I interned with Larry Yeagley back in the 80’s, and he was very devoted to helping the grieving. A fair bit of my training from him is going into this seminar. At the same time, there is a lot that is new since then in the Bereavement field so there’s that.

Dog, wife and me, out to Moab next month for some hiking and sunrise light shows. We can’t wait.

Dtr is working hard in her banking position and Michael is making the mega yachts safe to sail. They are great.

I’m back to writing more and have been making a lot of wood dust on the lathe and turning some beautiful pieces out of Walnut, Pear, Magnolia and Cedar. Max Relax in the shop.

Bloging for the Union paper, the Outlook, so you can find me there with my more thoughtful words. Called the Shepherds Voice. My passion is to introduce readers to the Good Shepherd as found in many passages of Scripture, the kernel of which is found in the 23rd Psalm, but goes way beyond the Psalms. Rich with text and the natural world of the Old Testament. Check it out even though it is still just getting started.

Since I’m probably the longest running pastor that blogs, I thought it good to put a few words in my personal blog, not having said much this year.

Hope you are well, if we know you and love you, say Hi. We walk around Holmes Lake park every morning when the sun comes up, come and join us some time. Others do.